I see so many post by people in my thyroid groups that make me so sad, they are frustrated and want to just give up because they feel useless or have family and friends that make them feel bad for being sick or even worse, they make them feel bad by calling them lazy or tell them to just suck it up and get over it. It's a very sad and painful feeling to be sick all the time and to have your friends and family think that you are just lazy or being a drama queen about it and that is just so not true. We are truly sick with a disease that cannot always be seen from the outside, we are tired to the point of exhaustion, freezing cold or sweating to death, we have painful and swollen joints and muscles, irregular or fast heart rates, our blood pressure is too high or too low, we have terrible digestive problems, weird rashes, dizzy spells, we swell up all the time, gain weight despite what we do to lose it, we have depression and anxiety, and I could just go on and on, but you get the picture, right??
Most people don't get it unless they have it and that makes us feel bad about being sick, it hurts us to know that other people think we are just lazy or making up excuses to not do anything and that is what makes us withdraw from life and people and the things we love doing. I hate being told that if I would just exercise or eat right or even just think positive, that my life will get so much better and I won't be sick anymore or that I can just take a pill and that will solve everything. Oh if only that were the case, my life would be perfect and fabulous all the time...they just don't get it and it hurts.
I have always been a busy body and I got things done, I had energy and the want to, to be able to do whatever it was that needed to be done...I didn't even think about it, I just did it. When I became sick, it was just horrible, I was so sick, for so long, that I had a hard time even taking care of myself, at first. I had to have my sister come and help me until I was strong enough to do it myself and that was hard for me...I was the care taker, I was the one who made sure everyone else was ok and it still bothers me to this day, that I still need help with some things. It made me angry for awhile and I withdrew from social activities and from people that I loved because I just felt so tired and so bad all the time, I felt useless, like I couldn't do anything for anyone, anymore and that left me in a horribly depressed state. People didn't get it, they just saw me from the outside, looking normal, like nothing was wrong at all.
It has been three years since I was first diagnosed with Graves Disease and it has been a long, hard, scary, and depressing road, but I am still here and even though I have wanted to give up many, many, times....I just couldn't do it...it's just not in me to give up. My mom and dad were very strong and loving people who supported me in everything I did, even when they knew it was a bad idea...they did it so that I would learn my own lessons, but the biggest gift they ever gave me was complete and total unconditional Love. I always knew that they love me and valued me beyond belief and that alone has contributed to me being who I am today.
I am here to tell you that you are worthy just because you are...you don't need anyone to tell you that you are or to make you feel accepted, we all have value in this world and we are all important, just because and if someone is telling you that you are lazy or crazy or whatever it is they are saying that is tearing you down and making you feel bad, it's not you or your problem...it's a problem that THEY are having...normal people don't go around tearing other people down, angry people do that.
We all have a purpose here on Earth, even if you don't see it, you do. It may be to tell someone the very things that I am writing about, or to show the world more about thyroid disease or just to smile at someone who needs it as much as we do. Never , Ever, give up or let someone make you feel less than you are, we are Warriors because we live with an invisible illness that debilitates us and we still get up and go on about out business, we still try to do all the things that we used to, and we still have hope that someday, we'll find what makes us feel better, we may do it a little differently than everyone else and we may have days that we just do nothing, but that has nothing to do with our self worth, it has everything to do with what we deal with on a daily basis and that fact that we still try everyday to fit in to what everyone else says is normal...we do this even when we are sick and feeling bad and miserable....it's ok to try to do these things everyday, but it's also ok to just have a down day and to just do whatever it is you need to do...it's ok to eel the way you feel...don't let other people tell you how you feel or tell you that it's wrong to feel the way you feel.
So...when you are feeling useless or unworthy because you or someone else is telling you that, just stop it!! We are all here for a reason and we all have value and the sooner you accept and love yourself, no matter what, the better off you'll be and you'll feel so much better too and that is the whole purpose with us...right?? We just want to feel better and to feel useful and worthy. Don't ever give up and never let someone make you feel bad, raise that chin and square up those shoulders and show them your fighting face...We are Warriors and should act accordingly! Have a great day!
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